I got promoted to manager and don't know how to lead. Now what?
Direct answerNew managers often struggle because they were promoted for technical skill, keep doing hands-on work, and don't know how to give direction or feedback. Leading is a new skill, and it can be learned. The first step is to meet one-on-one with each person on the team to understand their expectations, challenges, and how they prefer to work.
How it shows up
You were promoted, but you feel lost. You keep doing the technical work, avoid tough conversations, and the team doesn't seem to follow you.
Most likely root causes
- Clinging to technical workYou keep executing because that's where you feel safe, and there's no time left to lead.
- Expectations not agreed onNeither you nor the team knows what changed when you stepped in.
- Avoiding tough conversationsGiving feedback to or holding former peers accountable feels uncomfortable, and problems grow.
- No supportNo one prepared you for the role and you have no one to swap experiences with.
Quick self-check
- Have you had one-on-ones with each person on the team?
- Do you spend more time executing than guiding?
- Do you avoid giving feedback?
- Do you have someone more experienced to bounce ideas off?
If you answered yes to two or more, start with that cause.
First step today
Today, schedule 30-minute one-on-ones with each person on your team for next week.
30-day plan
- Week 1: hold the one-on-ones and agree with your own manager on what's expected of you in the new role.
- Weeks 2 and 3: set up regular team meetings, delegate a task you would have done yourself, and practice giving specific feedback.
- Week 4: ask the team for feedback on your leadership and adjust; find someone more experienced to mentor you.
When to seek professional help
Look for a mentor or a leadership development program if after a few weeks you still can't delegate or handle tough conversations. If there's serious conflict or a harassment complaint on the team, involve HR right away.
Frequently asked questions
- How do I lead former peers?
- Talk openly about the change, be consistent and fair, and avoid favoritism.
- Should I keep doing technical work?
- A little can help at first, but your main job now is to make the team work.